Thinking...

I was thinking back the other day... As to 10yrs ago where I was emotionally and physically. I sigh and wonder where did the old me go how did I get to this point in my life....

I was thinking of what changes I've gone through over the years...

10yrs ago

I was single but dating...

I lived alone...

Stayed up late...

Went to parties...

Had parties....

Worked full time...

Went to school full time...

Had a calling in the singles ward...

Slept 4-5 hours a night...

I was thin and attractive...

My whole life revolved around me...

I was so full of life and adventure...

My life was Fresh and New...

I sometimes long for those good old days again but then in the same breath I think...

Over the years...

I married and have a wonderful loving and adoring husband...

I've not only had 1 but 3 children that keep me on my toes..

I've moved 10 times in almost 10yrs...

I've gone from a size 12 to size 28 now back to 14 and getting smaller...

I've had my gallbladder removed...

I've been in great pain and felt great sorrow...

I've loved like I never thought possible and been loved unconditionally...

I'm a mother, wife, sister, daughter, teacher and business owner...

I've learned and accomplished more in these last 10yrs then I had in all the years before...

I've learned patience like I never thought I could...

I've cried...

I've laughed uncontrollably...

I've learned empathy and compassion...

I have grown and developed....

The list really could go on... I look at this and think..."Elisha look where you've come from! You came from a young woman to a real woman" As I look back at all the tears, frustration, confusion, sorrow, joy, and happiness that I have gone through, that it really has made me the person I am today... My husband said something to me the other day that kind of took me back when I asked him "If he could have a do over knowing what he knows now and all the stuff we've gone through in our married life if he would have still chosen to marry me"... He said "Yes, I didn't marry you because of your looks or for your body I married you because I knew who you would become and that is what I wanted." At first I felt kind of bad that I hadn't been what he really wanted at that time but then I got to thinking... I really was what he wanted because that meant that we could and would grow and change together. Besides if I really think back at that time I did the same thing with him. We married each other because we saw what each of us could become with the others nurturing and love.. What an amazing gift I have been given to have a man who would be so completely in love with me that he was willing to help me become who I'd always wanted to be... Now don't get me wrong there is still much improving that I want and need to do, but emotionally and mentally I feel I have surpassed the high school drama that so many women play out their whole lifes (it's almost as if they are still stuck at 16yrs old), and now I am the women who will be turning a mature 30 yrs old (soon).. I was thinking... I am truly blessed and I feel great joy knowing I have accomplished so much in such a short amount of time.. Just think most women never achieve this emotional breakthrough... This may sound like I'm on a soap box but I think it's ok to look back and as women pat our self on the back, for all we had endured and accomplished in our life... It's not vanity to be proud or ourselves it's how we know that all that we go through is worth the sweat and tears it's how we become like our heavenly mother and how we can help other to avoid our mistakes.. I am proud to be a women, a daughter of God and I want everyone to know it... It takes hard work but OH how it's worth it... As we get into Valentines Day remember to not only show love to your sweetheart but don't forget to show yourself some love as well.... Just thinking.....